Sometimes You Can't Make It On Your Own
by bobdabuilder0804
Summary: Was a song fic, now its not! Post S3. Jack struggles to accept help as he deals with his adiction. R and R please!


Re-posted without the lyrics.

****

Sometimes You Can't Make It On Your Own.

"Enough is enough," Tony ranted, "I'm going to see him."

"He doesn't want visitors honey, he's made that pretty clear," Michelle said softly, she knew how much Jack's condition had been bothering him over the past few days. She understood where he was coming from, Jack had saved Tony and he wanted to repay the favour. Only Jack wasn't going to give him the chance. He didn't want help from anyone, despite how much he needed it this time.

"Well that's his problem. I'm not going to sit around and just wait for him to kill himself. I'm not going to abandon him Michelle."

It tore her up to hear the pain in his voice, the stress underpinning each and every syllable as he spoke. "I understand," she muttered. She truly did. She felt for Jack, she had worried about him over the past few days, as she had for Chase, Kim, her husband... the list went on. She wanted it to end, she wanted to move past that day. But they couldn't, not yet. Not until Jack was past this little problem anyway. Then Tony would stop worrying about him and start helping himself. Then maybe she could focus on her own problems, the demons that had been following around since that day. Then maybe they all could move on and find happiness once more.

Tony drove over to Jack's house quickly, knowing the route already. After finding a spot to park and running over the neatly trimmed lawn he began to knock at the door. He hoped that Jack would answer once he tired of the constant noise his fists were making against the wooden door blocking his path. The door was answered, but Jack wasn't there.

Kim softly explained that he hadn't come home since the incident with Chase. He had called her to apologise for messing up again, saying he would be back when he was ready. He hadn't been home, all he had were his keys, cell and his wallet.

Tony was disappointed at first, but perked up when Kim explained her last phone call she had with him. It had been later that same day, he wanted to get an update on Chase's condition, he was worried. He said he was staying in an apartment and reluctantly gave her the address, just in case. Tony could sense her unease, she wanted to help Tony but didn't want to betray her father by giving him the address either. He had instructed her to keep it to herself and not to visit him, he would see her when he was ready. He could see the worry in her eyes as she spoke of him. What was he doing there? She figured that despite her fathers anger at she was doing the greater good, as Tony may be able talk some sense into him. She gave him the address.

After thanking Kim and promising to update her on her father Tony set off once more, now more determined to see Jack than ever.

He pulled up on the side of the road and climbed out of his car, wondering how he was going to be able to get through to Jack. He had parked down the road so Jack wouldn't recognise the car and lock the door. This also gave him time to think about his approach as he walked along the littered pathway towards the door marked with a number 27.

Tony realised he was nervous about seeing Jack, he had no idea what state he was going to be in. To prevent himself from changing his mind about seeing him he sped up and started pounding on the door as soon as he got to it. There was no bell so he continually knocked until finally, the door opened slightly and a weak, 'Hello?' sounded from behind the small opening of the door. It was Jack.

For a split second Tony was unsure if he should wait to be invited in or just barge in now while he had a chance. He chose the latter and pushed on the door with his shoulder heavily, flinging it open. He rushed inside and slammed it shut behind him before taking a breath, he was actually here, he hadn't expected to get this far. He didn't think he would even find Jack never mind make it into his house. He was surprised he had been able to get in and then his eyes fell on Jack who was now picking himself from the floor slowly, Tony's entrance had knocked him to the ground. He didn't speak, so Jack knew who was visiting him today.

Tony watched silently as Jack straightened out and looked at him. He expected anger, reluctance, something, but Jack's face showed nothing. It was blank, as though he didn't even recognise the man before him. The two stayed silent as they looked each other over, assessing the situation in their minds, deciding what to do. Jack finally spoke.

"Kim put you up to this?" Again the weak voice Tony noticed, he was still having a hard time. On or off the drugs he had no idea, he could only hope.

"No. I put me up to this. Were worried about you..."

Jack's scoff cut him off as he turned and made his way into the main room and perched himself on the edge of the couch, letting his head drop into his hands. Tony didn't think he had ever seen Jack look this vulnerable before. Well, except for one night...

"What are you doing here Jack?" Tony said exasperated, his arms going into the air as he spoke. He couldn't understand why Jack was doing to himself, why he tortured himself over everything, why he couldn't let others help him to move on.

"I'm... I'm trying to fix things." Jack muttered after a minutes silence. In reality he was, he just hadn't managed to fix much yet. His head was a mess and his relationship with Kim, well that was anyone's guess.

"How can you fix things here? Are you staying off the drug?"

He instantly regretted his words as he saw Jacks face flare up. Although it was not said as a derogatory comment he knew any mention of the habit would anger him. This was Jack after all, and a drug addiction would be the last thing on his list of things to talk about.

"I'm doing the best I can here Tony!" His voice raised, his words curt, he was trying to hold onto what sanity he had left as the conversation spiralled out of his control.

"Why do you even have to be here? Kim, Chase, Michelle and I have been worried sick about you Jack! Don't you want to comfort Kim, reassure her? She's going stir crazy waiting for you to call, too scared to come round here to see you in case you turn her away. This isn't fair on her."

"None of this is fair on her," he muttered looking down, ashamed with himself. He shook his head slightly, this wasn't helping him, he couldn't talk about this. "Look Tony I appreciate you coming round and all, but this isn't a good time." It was a lie but if it got rid of him that would be all right.

"Why isn't it a good time? You have someone coming round?" Tony asked curiously.

"Yes."

"Who would be calling round Jack?"

"Nobody you know, okay, so if you could just leave."

"I'm not stupid Jack, I'm not falling for your lies this time."

"Tony, get out," his anger boiling now, he knew exactly what lies Tony was referring to. "Why did you even come over here, huh? To gloat? To rub it in my face? I'm trying to deal with some things right now, you being here is not helping me."

Tony looked down at him with disbelief on his face, pain in his voice. "Is that what you think?"

Silence.

"Jack, the only reason I'm a free man is because of you. District were going to lock me away and throw away the key, but they didn't. Because of you and only you. Now let me repay the favour Jack, let me help you."

"No one can help me," his voice just a whisper which Tony barely herd. Throwing his hands up in frustration Tony sat down on the couch next to Jack, he didn't know how he could get through to him. Why couldn't he see this thing from all angles? He was here to help himself but the only way he would be able to do that was by letting people help him.

Shutting everyone out was preventing anything from happening. They were never going to get anywhere, why couldn't he see that?

Silence engulfed them again, which Jack was grateful for. Tony's presence was making his head run circles. He had to get him away, he had to do this alone. But what exactly was he trying to do? Tony realised that Jack wasn't going to speak so he decided to take the conversation in another direction, probe him until he found out what was tearing his friend up so badly inside. Before he did so he thought it would be better if he could relieve some of the tension, give Jack a little space to get his head together.

"Mind if I get myself a glass of water?"

"Sure. Kitchens through there," he silently wondered if he even had glasses, he didn't have much here. But if was more than enough given the possessions he had when he arrived, which was next to nothing.

Tony wandered through the small place to the kitchen, looking at the few valuables that he had here. He wondered how he managed to get these necessities when he hadn't contacted anyone. If he had his wallet then he probably had some credit cards which will have taken care of everything.

He just couldn't imagine Jack going out to buy what he needed in his mental state. Maybe someone had been helping him out.

He decided not to ask, if he lost his focus he wouldn't find out anything or help Jack either. Jack was too smart to let anything slip out, so he would have to find the answers himself. He made his way back to the small room and sank back down on the battered and worn couch that obviously came with the apartment.

"So what's happening with C.T.U? They dropped their charges against me thanks to you, what about you? Did Palmer manage to get them off your back too?" Tony assumed that Jack would have been Palmer's priority, so he figured taking this conversation this way would be good, it was safe ground so Jack would talk about it easier.

Jack sighed before starting, indicating he wasn't too interested in going over this. "I went back after meeting Kim in the hospital. I interrogated two of the couriers we had. I was debriefed, which took a few hours. After that Hammond called me to his office, where he fired me, and then I left."

Tony noticed the difference in his voice. It was calm and slightly higher than normal, he was trying to keep it clear, keep the bitterness and pain out of it as he spoke. Once again he was trying to appear strong, he didn't want anyone to see how broken he really was, in case they tried to help put him back together.

"Just like that? They didn't... they didn't even put you into a programme or anything?"

Jack's glare stopped him, and he realised he was stupid for asking.

"Well Brad suggested that I get some help, before I left," again the bitterness creeping into his voice, the anger he was trying so hard to hide.

Tony didn't want to push the topic but he had to ask, he hoped it wouldn't cause Jack to shut him out completely, which was a possibility.

"Have you Jack...?"

More silence.

"Have you got any help?"

"No. I don't need it. That's why I'm here. I need to be away from everyone. I'll sort it out on my own."

"I don't want to pry Jack but what have you done to fix it so far? Are you still using?"

This time there was no anger in his voice. He knew that Tony wasn't trying to push him down, he wanted to help, he could hear the concern in his voice. He understood that much. "I'm... I'm tampering off. Its slow but its working. I'm only using a third of what I used to take. Once I can get it down to one fix a day I'm going to stop altogether."

Tony studied him. He could hear the determination in his voice, he really was going to try beat this. But what if determination wasn't enough, what if he physically wasn't able to complete his plans?

"Your sure it wouldn't be easier if you had people with you. I mean, coming off it this way can be dangerous can't it?"

Jack herd the worry in his voice and felt relieved. He wasn't arguing. Maybe he did have one friend after all, at least someone who seemed to care about him, who wasn't obligated to because of blood.

"Tony it will be even harder to do if people are there, trust me."

"Why Jack, I don't understand."

"Look... Seeing Kim makes me think of Chase... He reminds me of everything I failed to do. Its not his fault and I don't blame him, but that's the way it is. He was going to quit field ops, he said he owed it to his family, Tony. For me, its just... Its just too much. He's doing everything I failed to do, he is doing everything I did wrong, the right way... I can't face that now, it hard enough to face myself as it is... It just makes things feel worse."

It was now Tony's turn to be silent. He had never herd Jack talk about himself so personally, he always locked it away deep down inside of him. Part of him was touched by his words, Jack had to trust him greatly to talk to him the way he just did. He realised what he had to do, despite not wanting to leave Jack alone, he had to abide by his wishes. He had to let him do this on his own.

"I understand Jack, I really do. I'm sorry that you feel that way, but you have to understand that Kim and Chase don't see that-"

"I know. I know Tony. Its just me. I'll deal with that once I'm past this." If I get past this, he thought. "I know you want to help me Tony, and I'm grateful for that. Even if I don't show it, I really am. But you gotta let me do this my way. I'm sorry."

The two sat still before Tony gulped down the cool water, he'd never been this nervous before, Jack opening up to him had really surprised him.

"I'm going to get going, there's some stuff I have to do."

Jack stood up and walked Tony to the door, slowly. Everything he did was so slow, Tony noticed. It felt strange.

"Thanks for stopping by Tony. I appreciate it." Jack said, looking him directly in the face to show him this wasn't another one of his lies.

Tony opened the door a little but let his hand rest on Jacks arm. "If you need anything Jack, anything, just give me a call. Were all waiting to help."

Jack averted his eyes now embarrassed. He felt weak when people tried to help him, despite knowing they were trying to do the right thing for him. "Thanks," he muttered, before closing the door after him.

He wandered back to the couch and let the conversation run through his mind, seeing Tony had made him feel better, it had reminded him of what he had after this was all over. He thought about what he had told him and realised himself just how personal it had been. He knew that he would normally be wanting a fix after something like this, but he wasn't craving it this time. He would be able to hold out until he went to sleep later. This alone cheered his dismal mood, it was progress. Once step closer to getting his life back.

Michelle jumped up when she saw Tony getting out of the car through the gap the blinds provided, eager to know how his unexpected visit went down. He sauntered into the house closing the door behind himself and leant down into her waiting arms as they hugged tightly. He often found himself doing this after spending any time away from her, no matter how short. The fact that they were both alive and together was a blessing, something they wouldn't forget any time soon.

She led him into the living room and he sank down into his armchair, rubbing his eyes as he wondered if he should tell her what he and Jack had spoke of. Part of him wanted to tell her about how he had opened up to him and what he said, but he knew he couldn't do that, it would stay between him and Jack only. He knew if Jack even suspected he had told others of their deep conversation their strong bond of trust would be shattered.

"How did it go?" Michelle pried, seeing her husbands far off gaze, lost in thought. She always managed to drag him back to the surface he thought with a smile.

"It went."

"Tony," She giggled, he always did this to her, kept her waiting. "How was Jack, is he okay?"

"I think so. He looked a lot better." He didn't know why he was trying to reassure her, maybe that way he could convince himself.

"That's good," and then they fell into a reflective silence as they both thought about how strange this all was. They were both struggling to readjust to this unfamiliar territory they were now stranded in. "Is he getting clean?" She asked quietly, knowing Tony was as touchy on the subject as Jack. He was always expecting an attack, ready to defend him to others. Today he didn't have to. Thankfully no criticisms were being made.

"He's doing it his own way," he said, before seeing Michelle's frown which made him continue. "You know Jack, he will fight this to the end. He said he was going to quit and he will, he just wants to do it on his own. We have to respect that."

"All right Tony," Michelle said allowing a smile to form on her face. She thought it was sweet how much her husband believed in Jack, but she couldn't see him getting over this alone. She just hoped he would be strong and brave enough to ask for help when it was needed.

Days passed by since Tony's visit and Tony found himself more and more worried with each passing day. He knew he should just push Jack out of his mind, but he couldn't.

What if he wasn't able to come off the drug on his own, what if something bad had happened and nobody was there to help him? Michelle tried to reassure him by telling him that Jack was smart enough to know when he needed help. He was obviously doing good on his own, and it wasn't as though he couldn't handle it, he was strong enough to get through this.

Tony had smiled at her words, trying to pretend everything was all right and that he agreed with her. But he didn't. She hadn't seen him before, she didn't talk to him. He had looked so weak, and that was when he was on a third of his usual dosage. How bad would it become when there was none of it in his system at all? It wouldn't be good, he thought, and the fact that he couldn't shake his bad feeling away only reinforced his worry. Still he stayed away, sure Jack would be angry if he visited or even called him. He wouldn't be able to concentrate on his task if people kept interrupting. That was what he told himself, but he knew that if anything actually happened to him he would never forgive himself for giving in and letting Jack have his own way so easily.

Jack had played his conversation with Tony through his mind multiple times over the passing days. He had found it to be a helpful distraction when things became hard, and was beginning to understand what Tony meant when he said things would be easier if people were there for him. One conversation had helped him, so how much easier would this be with people there all of the time? It was a tempting thought although he knew nothing would come of his thoughts on the matter, he would never ask for help. That would be like giving in.

He was a man of pride and asking someone for help with the mess he had created for himself was uncalled for. Nobody deserved to be brought into his problems, after all they were _his_ problems, he should deal with them. On top of that was the fact that he didn't want anyone to see him like this. He could still picture the worry in Tony's eyes, the sympathy. Although they had the right intentions that was the very last thing his morale needed right now. Every time a pair of eyes saw him in this weakened state was like a kick to his ego that he couldn't take, he didn't want anyone to see him this way. Especially not Kim. He had worked so hard to shield her from knowing about his addiction, the last thing he was going to do would be to ask her to help him get rid of it. That wasn't even a possibility, and it would never happen. He would not allow himself to be so helpless before his daughters eyes. Not ever. She deserved more than that.

He realised that he missed her terribly, and wondered if he should call. She would probably be worried about him, and a call from him would cheer her up. He was restless and scared that his mind would start demanding he take the drug to give it something to do. He was pleased he wasn't craving it yet today, and hadn't given in to it yet. Down to half his dosage and not even craving, he didn't expect to get this far, but now he knew he was going to make it all the way.

He stood up and made his way to the small kitchen where he poured himself a glass of water and drank it straight down. Realising that his stomach was going to keep it down today, and that his head wasn't causing him too much pain from the movement, he wondered if he would be able to visit her. In person. A surprise. It would be just what he needed, and it would boost his hope incredibly.

He went into the room where a few of his cloths were laid over an old dusty chair and pulled some trousers on over the white shorts he had been wearing all day, before selecting a shirt with long sleeves. No reason to make things harder than they needed to be. After throwing that over his head and still feeling in decent shape, he made his decision. He was going to see her.

He was going to drive over but before he opened up his car he realised that he may enjoy the walk, it wasn't too far and the weather was nice. The sun was shining, and at first its glare hurt his eyes as they hadn't been accustomed to real light over the past few days. They soon adjusted while he walked and he enjoying the cool breeze, feeling his shoulders relax some as the tension was released from them. He felt free as he walked, nothing was controlling him today, he really was free from the drug. He knew it wouldn't last and at night it would get worse, the struggle would start all over again; but today he was free and he was going to enjoy it.

He slung his hands in his pockets and walked at a steady pace, not wanting to push his body too hard, he was still surprised at how it was reacting to the activity. If it got bad afterwards he could always ask Kim for a lift back or catch a cab. He doubted it would get to that point while he was with her, he didn't intend to stay too long. He just wanted to see her, hold her and let her know he was going to be okay.

The walk took over 30 minutes and he was feeling the strain from it as he walked up the pathway leading to his house. He wondered if he should walk right in or not. It was his home, but he wasn't living there. He decided to knock as he didn't want to scare Kim.

He rand the bell twice, and wondered if she was out. Maybe she was visiting Chase at the hospital or at work, he realised he didn't even know her status there. He was about to turn and leave when he herd the door open. He looked up from his shoes to see his daughters surprised face, clearly not expecting him to be stood before her. After a few seconds the initial shock wore of and she pulled him to her, wrapping her arms around his shoulders as she tried not to cry. She held onto him tightly and tried to stop herself from getting emotional, she was just so happy he had come to see her, part of her had wondered if she would ever see him again.

The two hugged before Kim told him to come in, making a joke of him knocking on his own door. He was glad she did as it eased the uncomfortable tension between them while telling him he was welcome home whenever he wanted to come back. And he would come home too, he told himself, once he kicked his habit he would be right back home, no doubt about it.

Kim led him to the living room where they both sat down on chairs opposite each other, before Kim tried to get him something to eat. Jack declined, saying he was full. He didn't want to say that his stomach wouldn't keep it down or it would remind Kim of his habit and why he was visiting and not living here with her right now. She was pleased to see that he looked well, and Jack smiled when she told him so, saying that he felt well too. Kim couldn't help but smile back.

Kim made conversation for a while, informing him on Tony, Michelle and Angela, who she had been looking after recently. She cautiously told him she found herself coming close to the baby, but she and Chase hadn't spoken about what they were going to do yet. Jack asked about Chase and could sense Kim's unease as soon as he got onto the subject.

"He's uh, he's doing good. They are very optimistic about his hand."

"That's great baby."

"Yeah. Um... the doctors released Chase from hospital yesterday, they said there was no danger as long as he rests, which he doesn't need a doctor for. So, I said he could move in here while he is still recovering." She paused, hoping her father wasn't going to get angry, she thought he would, although the look on his face showed one of deep thought instead.

She knew she had to be careful on this topic, she didn't want to give him the wrong impression, that she didn't need him anymore. That would be the worst thing for him to think, and was untrue too. Kim didn't think she had needed him as much as she did now,

"What about his hand I thought it would need further treatment?"

"Yes it will, but that will be done by the person who will take him through his physio. Until then it can be left alone."

"Oh... So when is he moving in?" Although he wasn't pleased with the revelation he knew he couldn't get on at Kim, he didn't want to push her away, he needed her more than anyone. So instead he kept quiet, trying to banish the new thought appearing in his head, telling him that she really didn't need him anymore. He knew it was untrue, if that was the case she wouldn't be sat talking to him now, she was just trying to take care of her boyfriend. He knew he couldn't blame her for that either, especially when he was the sole reason her boyfriend needed taking care of.

"I brought him straight here. He's sleeping now," almost an after thought she quickly added, " In the guest room."

"And what about his little girl?"

"She's here too, I was only too happy to care for her. She's been sleeping in with Chase since he returned. She's so much calmer around him," she smiled, happy he wasn't turning this into a big deal. He seemed fine with the matter.

"Yeah..." Jack muttered, trying to snap himself out of the daze this conversation had produced in his head.

"Can I see him, I'd really like to talk to him?"

"Sure Dad. You know where he is." She sat still and watched as he slowly rose and made his way out of the room, looking around. Everything seemed different to him know, as though he was looking at it all with a different pair of eyes.

Jack tapped on the door lightly and heard Chases gruff voice in response. He entered the room cautiously, almost scared to face him for the first time since the incident. He stepped in the room to see Chase weakly sat up against a bunch of pillows in bed, rocking his daughter from side to side gently with his good arm, holding her against his chest for support. He looked up and smiled when he saw Jack, immediately asking him how he was. Jack said he was all right, before asking Chase the same question, concern sketched all over his face.

Chase said he was doing good, and thanked Jack for letting him stay there, saying it had been a big help being so close to Kim. Jack wondered around the room as he spoke, before pulling a chair out from beneath the oak desk and sitting on it restlessly, nervous about this conversation.

"So what's happening at C.T.U? Hammond debriefed me a couple of days ago in the hospital, was very tight lipped about this whole thing. After I signed a form for medical leave he couldn't wait to leave, scared he was going to let something slip," Chase said with humour in his voice as he thought back to the occasion.

"I don't know what's going on either," he offered, not wanting to tell Chase the truth. He was embarrassed, and he knew it would anger him too. The last thing Chase needed now was to be worrying about him, it was supposed to be the other way around.

"What do you mean? Did they give you leave too, to clear up your... problem?"

"Not exactly. It doesn't matter." Chase picked up on how evasive Jack was being on the subject and realised what was happening.

"It does matter Jack. What the hell happened? Tony said that Palmer made sure all charges were dropped against the pair of you before he stepped down from office."

"He did. Look Chase I didn't come here to get into this with you, I just wanted to see that you were okay," he tried to change the subject, he didn't want to argue with him about it..

"Tell me," Chase said, his voice strong his eyes staring into Jack, he wasn't going to let it go until he knew every little detail. Jack reminded himself that he should have know this was going to happen. It was what he would do, and Chase and he were exactly alike.

"They fired me," he said calmly, before speaking up again before Chase could jump in, which he was about to, "It doesn't matter, Chase. Honestly."

"It doesn't matter! What are you crazy Jack, after everything you have done for them, everything you gave up for them, they do this! They can't do this Jack they can't-"

"They can and they did. End of story," Jack said cutting Chase off, slightly irritated now.

"So they just turned their back on you?"

"Yeah." Jack muttered, Saunders words now echoing through his head. He was right.

They gave up on him, just like they did Saunders all that time ago. He tried to shake the thought from his mind, he didn't need to be reminded of Saunders when he was doing so well.

"Listen Chase, I appreciate your concern and I see where you are coming from, I really do. But what happened has happened, we've just got to move on. I need to get going anyway. Its good to see you... I hope everything works out with the hand."

"Don't worry it will." Chase said, still annoyed about Jack's lack of concern about C.T.U's behaviour towards him. Surely he should at least feel angry?

Jack left the room closing the door behind him and headed back downstairs. He wanted to leave but instead found himself sitting down in one of the chairs in the living room. Kim watched him and waited for him to talk as something was clearly on his mind.

"You okay?" She asked, wondering if he would tell her what it was.

"Yeah sweetie. Just a little tired."

"What did you and Chase talk about?"

"Nothing. He found out I was fired... He wasn't very pleased." He was glad Kim had quietly nodded when he told her the news, saying a silent prayer in her head. She would never tell him her real feelings about this, in her mind by firing him they had given him a lifeline.

"Well you can understand why he's angry. He's going to want their heads for this!"

Jack smiled, there she was, trying to make him feel better. Always looking out for him.

"I need to get going. I don't want to be a pain, but is there any chance I can get a lift back?

Its fine if your busy I'll walk, its just-"

"Dad its fine. Of course I'll take you back. You can stay here if you want."

Jack smiled. "No thank you. I need to do this on my own. I just needed to see you today, that's why I came."

"I'm glad you did. You know I'll always be here waiting for you to come back, once you do whatever it is you need to do." Jack smiled as she dodged the subject again. He silently wondered if she was doing it for her sake or his.

Jack climbed into the passenger side of the black S.U.V quietly, making the assumption that Kim was on leave from C.T.U seen as she still had the car. He watched as she adjusted her mirror, before asking him for directions. He felt uncomfortable as she drove as he couldn't think of any conversation. Kim was too busy concentrating on the road to make any herself.

"How long is Chase going to be there?" He immediately wanted to kick himself as he spoke. It would sound as though he didn't want Chase there, or that he was interfering between them. He was just trying to ease the new born tension between them.

"Um, I don't know. Until he gets used to his reduced abilities I guess. He will probably be gone before you come back home... Not too long," she added, turning to smile at him.

She wanted to make sure he understood that this was not her trying to put distance between them. She wanted him home, and she knew she would have to make this clear to him or he would think otherwise.

"Listen Kim," he started, his voice calm as he squeezed his hand into a fist to keep it that way, "I understand if you don't want Chase to leave. I can stay where I am. I might as well stay there, be out of your way. I can go get my stuff tomorrow and be gone."

Kim slammed the breaks on and the car skidded to a halt as she stared at her father in disbelief.

"What?" She shouted, clearly confused. "I don't understand you dad. I tell you I want you to come home and you say you will move out? Why can't you understand that I don't want you to leave, I never did, you could deal with your problem at home with me, I would have helped you. Why can't you understand that I'm not angry at you," she stopped as she tried to calm herself. Shouting wasn't going to get through to him. "I want you to come home. I understand that you want to deal with this by yourself, but once its over I want you home. I miss you..." she said as she felt the tears threaten to come.

"I'm sorry I didn't mean to upset you, I just though..."

"You thought wrong." She whispered as she got herself into control. She leant over and hugged him while he sat there astonished that she really did mean this. She wasn't trying to get rid of him, she wasn't ashamed or angry at him. She missed him. Someone really did miss him.

Kim felt him hug her back and herd him whisper, 'thank you,' in her ear. She felt her eyes fill up again, tears of happiness this time, no more frustration.

Jack finally understood. He thought back to his conversation with Tony as he continued to hug her, before smiling to himself. He could do this, he could fight his habit. He knew it would be easier, now knowing there was something waiting for him after this obstacle was passed. His life.

END


End file.
